I take great pride in sharing with you the information that professionals know about how to encourage social skills development in people, especially those with lagging executive function skills.
Consequently, I believe that the more information you are given, the better you can to support it.
Be Patient: Transformation happens very slowly.
As a parent, you are there all the time and their partner, but it can be confusing for both of you to navigate the social terrain. Further, this process requires an abundance of patience!
Move from “No!!” to “Hmmm?…..“
Bridge to Betterment
In my book, I describe Bridge to Betterment, the process of moving from “no thank you!” – to realization – to change.
Your role as a social skills coach is not to push, but rather to hold a mirror to their actions and help them understand how change can happen. You will constantly need to help them see things… and this is where open ended questions and reflective listening come into play.
As you move through the stages of change… you will hear them say, “I kinda wish I had done that differently…” These nuggets can provide huge information as to how they think.
Model by your own actions and talk about how communication and friendship skills requires action. Discuss the stages of friendships and learn more about which stage they are in with each friend. Use questions and reflective listening to help your child or student to agree, disagree, tell clarifying information and to realize what they are doing. Find the carrot of who they want to be and link this to social skills and friendships.
Remember – Connection requires action! #ConnectionMatters
Social Skills Deeper Dive
More actionable advice, exercises and videos can be found in the Store