Why People With ADHD Tend To Feel FOMO More Intensely

Raise your hand if you’ve ever been scrolling through social media, watching a group of friends at a concert or seeing coworkers grabbing drinks, and suddenly felt that pit in your stomach—that pang of why wasn’t I there? or what am I missing? If this sounds familiar, you might be dealing with FOMO (Fear of Missing Out). And if you have ADHD, this feeling can hit harder and more often than it does for neurotypical folks.

As someone who has spent years coaching kids, teens, and adults with ADHD, I see the impact FOMO has on people’s lives a lot. People with ADHD experience emotions in a big way. We crave excitement, novelty, and connection. And when we feel like we’re missing out on something better, it can spiral into anxiety, self-doubt, or even impulsively saying “yes” to things we don’t even want to do. So let’s break down why this happens—and what you can do about it.

Why People with ADHD Experience FOMO More Intensely

FOMO is more than just a passing feeling—it’s a mix of biology, psychology, and the way our ADHD brains process the world. Research shows that FOMO is linked to social comparison theory, self-determination theory and emotional dysregulation. For people with ADHD, these factors are amplified and it can feel very challenging to give in to the pressure from others (however real or unreal) to do and act in ways that may not align with your highest values.

In my work with clients, there are many ways FOMO and ADHD run hand-and-hand, here are just a few.

1. Our Brains Run on Interest, Not Importance

People with ADHD don’t just struggle with attention—we struggle with interest. If something isn’t stimulating or rewarding, our brains often check out. That means when we see something fun happening somewhere else, our current reality might feel dull in comparison. Our brain says, I need excitement NOW!—cue the FOMO.

2. Hyperfocus Makes Everything Else Seem Less Exciting

Hyperfocus is one of our ADHD superpowers, but when it’s directed at something negative—like imagining how much fun others are having without us—it can turn into an obsession. We replay scenarios, compare ourselves to others, and let that feeling of exclusion grow bigger than it really is.

3. Impulsivity Pushes Us to Chase the Next Big Thing

Ever RSVP’d “yes” to three events in one night? Or bought last-minute concert tickets just in case? That’s ADHD-driven impulsivity in action. We act fast to avoid missing out, sometimes without thinking about whether we even want to go.

4. Rejection Sensitivity Turns FOMO into “They Don’t Want Me”

Many people with ADHD experience rejection sensitivity (RS)—a deep emotional reaction to perceived exclusion or judgment. So when we see friends hanging out without us (even if we were invited and forgot!) it can feel personal.

Our brains love dopamine, and social media delivers it on a silver platter. But seeing curated highlight reels of other people’s lives reinforces the feeling that we’re missing out on something better. It’s an ADHD-perfect storm—an endless cycle of scrolling, comparing, and craving.

How to Manage FOMO in an ADHD-Friendly Way

Here’s the good news: You don’t have to let FOMO control you. Instead of resisting it, let’s work with your ADHD brain to navigate it in a way that actually sticks. These are just a few of the hacks I teach clients to help them move away from the pressure FOMO adds to their lives.

1. Flip the Script: Turn FOMO into JOMO (Joy of Missing Out)

Instead of worrying about what you could be doing, shift your focus to what’s great about what you’re already doing. ADHD brains respond well to gamification, so trying giving yourself “streak points” for:

Staying present in the moment and focusing on what’s in front of you (not behind you or ahead of you).
Noticing what you enjoyed about your day, rather than focusing on others.
Writing an ongoing list of your wins and successes so you see what’s positive right before your eyes.

2. Catch the Comparison Spiral Before It Starts

When FOMO kicks in, pause and tell yourself:

“Social media is a highlight reel, not real life.”
“There will always be another opportunity.”
“What’s one thing I love about what I’m doing right now?”

This small reframe helps pull you out of comparison mode and helps you focus on what is going well in your life.

Since ADHD brains struggle with willpower, don’t rely on self-control. Instead:

Use a social media delay app like “One Sec” to add a pause before opening an app.
Rename social media folders something silly like “Are you sure?” to disrupt impulsive checking.
Turn off notifications so your social media stays out of sight and out of mind.

4. Ask Yourself Before Saying “Yes”

FOMO makes us say “yes” to things we don’t even want to do. Before committing, ask:

“Do I actually want to do this, or am I just afraid of missing out?”
“Will this add to my energy or drain me?”
“Is this how I want to spend my time or am I distracting myself from something more important?”

Sometimes, the best decision is simply to stay home. 🙂

Managing FOMO requires some effort especially if you’re in the habit of responding and reacting to others on a regular basis. But, you can shift your behavior so you are less reactive to what others say is “important” and instead, learn how to decide for yourself what really matters.

You’re Not Missing Out, You’re Living Differently

FOMO is tough, but here’s the truth: You’re not missing out—you’re just doing life in your own way. People with ADHD have incredible lives full of adventure, passion, and connection. The key is focusing on what excites and fulfills YOU—not what looks fun in someone else’s Instagram post.

So next time you feel FOMO creeping in, take a deep breath, put your phone down, and ask yourself: What’s something awesome I can do for myself right now? That is how you learn to move away from FOMO and into a life that truly aligns with your values and your goals.

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