I take great pride in sharing with you the information that professionals know about how to encourage social skills development in people, especially those with lagging executive function skills.
Consequently, I believe that the more information you are given, the better you can to support it.
Be Patient: Transformation happens very slowly.
As a parent, you are there all the time and their partner, but it can be confusing for both of you to navigate the social terrain. Further, this process requires an abundance of patience!
Move from “No!!” to “Hmmm?…..“
Bridge to BettermentIn my book, I describe Bridge to Betterment, the process of moving from “no thank you!” – to realization – to change.
Your role as a social skills coach is not to push, but rather to hold a mirror to their actions and help them understand how change can happen. You will constantly need to help them see things… and this is where open ended questions and reflective listening come into play.
As you move through the stages of change… you will hear them say, “I kinda wish I had done that differently…” These nuggets can provide huge information as to how they think.
Model by your own actions and talk about how communication and friendship skills requires action. Discuss the stages of friendships and learn more about which stage they are in with each friend. Use questions and reflective listening to help your child or student to agree, disagree, tell clarifying information and to realize what they are doing. Find the carrot of who they want to be and link this to social skills and friendships.
Remember – Connection requires action! #ConnectionMatters
Social Skills Deeper Dive
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Caroline Maguire, M.Ed. is an ADHD coach, author, and sought-after speaker on SEL, ADHD, and neurodiversity. For more than 15 years, she has helped parents, adults, and educators strengthen emotional regulation, social awareness, and real-world social skills, including her “social spy” approach. Her debut book, Why Will No One Play With Me?, won multiple awards, including American Book Fest’s Best Parenting and Family Book (2020). Her next book, Friendship Skills for Neurodivergent Adults, is scheduled for release in April 2026.
In my book, I describe Bridge to Betterment, the process of moving from “no thank you!” – to realization – to change.
Your role as a social skills coach is not to push, but rather to hold a mirror to their actions and help them understand how change can happen. You will constantly need to help them see things… and this is where open ended questions and reflective listening come into play.
As you move through the stages of change… you will hear them say, “I kinda wish I had done that differently…” These nuggets can provide huge information as to how they think.
Model by your own actions and talk about how communication and friendship skills requires action. Discuss the stages of friendships and learn more about which stage they are in with each friend. Use questions and reflective listening to help your child or student to agree, disagree, tell clarifying information and to realize what they are doing. Find the carrot of who they want to be and link this to social skills and friendships.
Remember – Connection requires action! #ConnectionMatters
