Will My Child Find a Best Friend This School Year?
Social skills may not come naturally to kids with ADHD, who may seem bossy or oblivious, attract bullies, or hide in video games. Here’s how to help your child make friends (and keep them) this year.
Bossy. Irritating. Loud. Spacey. Random. Children and teens with ADHD are called all these things. We see their genuine and loving hearts, but they have trouble keeping, making, and being accepted by friends. And that is heartbreaking.
When parents help strengthen social skills in kids with ADHD, however, friendships can blossom into lifelong relationships. Here are tips for different age groups as your student heads into the school year.
Elementary School
The Wallflower: Doesn’t mix in and is passively social
Walking the rim of the playground, sitting alone at lunch, rarely invited to “hang,” these kids spend a lot of time alone. One encounter with rejection, real or perceived, will stop them from trying to initiate a friendship again.
What you can do:
Explain to your child that people want to hear from her; she matters! Encourage your child to “use her words” to express her needs. Practice conversations she will have in daily life with teachers, bus drivers, coaches, and grandparents. Encourage her to express emotions and build self-advocacy and communication skills.
The root problem here may be low self-esteem, as children with ADHD often expect alienation, regardless of what they do. Find a place for her to shine. What are her superpowers? How can she use them? Where can you find like-minded kids? It is easier to persuade younger kids to try new things, so now is the time to introduce new activities and groups. Friends build confidence and assuage loneliness.