Smart Habits Of Parents Who Raise The Most Resilient Kids
Parents have a duty to raise their kids to become well-rounded, strong people.
From a developmental perspective, parents should expect resistance to be in full force from their kids, whether they’re seven or 17. But a parent’s job is to help their kids find their strength when they are resistant and ready to give up. It gives them practice for a set of skills that build resilience, and that is a valuable asset for any person — child or adult.
Kids will have different agendas from their parents, and this is to be expected. The more parents push, the more their kids resist. But what is important is implementing the smart habits of parents who raise the most resilient kids, and how they preserve their child’s dignity as well as their own in the face of disagreement.
Here are 11 smart habits of parents who raise the most resilient kids
1. They listen intently
Kids may not want to initially broach the real reason for their resistance, but parents can ask open questions and listen for the answers. Let them lead the conversation. Yes, parents may already know about their struggles, but if they sit, look them in the eye, and let them express their feelings and how challenges are affecting their lives, they will open the door to partnering for solutions.
As licensed marriage and family therapist David Schwartz explained, “Just listening to children talk may not seem like a big deal at first. However, the time you spend listening to them is time in which they feel valued. It’s like planting seeds for their future that can blossom into an inner strength and self-confidence. It is this belief in themselves that can help them develop the courage to pursue their own dreams in the not-too-distant future.”
2. They’re empathetic
When kids tell their parents they can’t do something, it means they’re opening up. Let them recognize that you can feel their pain by saying, “I know this is must be hard for you.” Even if you think their perspective is incorrect, don’t say, “You can do it!” It’s one of the incredibly smart habits of parents who raise the most resilient kids.
If your child is opening up, let them know that you are listening and truly care about their feelings. Don’t shut them down or ignore them. Instead, show empathy and let them know you have their back, no matter what.