Holiday Conversations: Ten Tips to Manage Your Emotions and Communicate Better
As we approach the holiday season, everyone has a list of expectations about how it will go.
- “Last year was a disaster when Uncle Gil went on and on about the government.”
- “We’d better ask Aunt Fran not to share too much about her work. Everyone was embarrassed about how much she overshared.”
- “Make sure to not ask Alicia to bring a side dish, she got into arguments with everyone about making it gluten free/sugar free/vegan.”
Add in a dose of an election year, a war in Ukraine, another one in the Middle East, and there are landmines galore to deal with. Not to mention the fact that some family members do not believe in or understand ADHD.
With many adults finding out that ADHD is the reason behind their many lifelong struggles, difficulties with relatives might arise over this new information. And, of course, children with ADHD might need their own supportive environment as they navigate sitting at a table during long conversations, the excitement of seeing people after a long absence, and the anticipation of opening highly exciting gifts.
While it would be ideal for family to get educated and be supportive of one another, often this is not the case. And while families may want to come together with the best of intentions, many still manage to fall into arguments and disagreements.
Some of these arguments really stem from a spark being ignited that reminds people of what happened last year—or even years ago. When past events are still fresh and unresolved, the mere idea of getting together can spark anxiety and fear that this year will be “more of the same.” Such feelings make it hard for families who deeply love each other to see a path towards a peaceful or stress-free holiday.
If that is your goal, I have ten tips to help you set up your holiday with some well-deserved insulation so you’re less likely to walk into a landmine. And, if you do, you’ll have a clear plan to get out of it as unscathed as possible.